09.30.09
Doggies and Kitties and Scams, Oh My!
Love your pets? Want to know what they’re thinking, or if they’re watching you in spirit form after they’ve died — pardon me, “passed?” Well, you’re in luck! Just pay this crazy lady three hundred dollars and she’ll spend half an hour talking to your pets, alive or dead, with her mind. Without fail, she’ll tell you that your live pets love you and are very happy (though they may want more treats!) and your dead pets are always with you and want you not to be sad. Remarkably predictable, those animals are.
This scam would disgust me if she wasn’t so bad at it. I listened to an hour or so of the radio show last night, where you can get a snippet of advice or clairvoyance for free. Now, I realize the people who are inclined to call in to such a show are already predisposed to believe in Ms. Fitzpatrick’s “psychic powers,” but wouldn’t you think getting every single thing wrong in one call would be a little bit of a tipoff? Maybe the third time the psychic says she’s sensing a certain person telling her something and you say “Oh no, that must be this other person we haven’t talked about yet” and she says “Yes! That’s who it is!” after you’ve fricking told her who it is you might start to get some inkling that she’s just making this shit up? Maybe?
I dunno. I realize that even the most hardcore cynic is susceptible to being fooled sometimes, but if you’re going to be fooled, at least endeavor not to do so at the hands of someone who is so transparently bad at her job.
For bonus points, when Ms. Fitzpatrick is not talking to dead animals she’s busy extolling the virtues of homeopathic medicine. Apparently she missed the newsflash that pretending plain old water is medicine is bullshit. (The reader responses at the bottom there are comedy gold, too.)
Sadly, what I was listening to was a re-airing and so I could not call in to ask her what Tickler was thinking.